Nursing strike - a very real experience

When you think about breastfeeding problems you probably think about sore nipples, sleepless nights, cluster feeding, blocked ducts and mastitis. What you don't tend to hear about are nursing strikes. Something that can be very distressing for both mother and baby and usually completely out of the blue.

At almost 8 months old JJ decided to go on a "proper" nursing strike. I've had times when he's refused a feed or two through the night but this was 84 hours of solid breast refusal. It was completely out of the blue and I genuinely started to lose hope of us ever feeding again. The only thing I know for sure that was at play was teething. He cut his 2nd bottom tooth and was in a lot of physical pain pulling at his ears often. He had his last feed at around 10pm on Saturday night and then refused every time until around 10am on the Wednesday. I didn't do anything differently, he just appeared to get over the pain/fear.

I searched the Internet and found lots of information on nursing strikes and things to try to encourage baby back to the breast but what I didn't find were any real life experiences so i thought i would share ours in the even it may help someone somewhere.

First and foremost the most important thing for you to do is make sure your baby is fed and your supply protected. For me this meant pumping around the clock with my manual pump (tiring). We fed JJ expressed milk in a bottle as he was happy to take it that way. We used a munchkin latch (supposed to mimic the breast) and ended up dropping to a size 1 teat to make it harder work for him as I wanted to avoid bottle preference.

Everytime I offered the breast he would winge and push me away and every time I felt rejected and overcome with emotions. I was so upset at the thought of our feeding journey being over with no warning before i was ready and the longer it went on the more I lost hope in him ever feeding again. One thing I noticed though was that he wanted to snuggle up and sleep on my chest. And in the night he would open his mouth to latch then cry and push away. I can only imagine the action of nursing was painful for him. On day 3 I actually text my health visitor line and in the time between that and me receiving a response he fed! He was distracted watching baby sensory on YouTube and I offered sat on the floor with my back to the t.v so he could still see it. I had to withstand a little biting first (ouch). I was so conscious not to yelp and scare him further but it was worth it because he then latched and fed properly. I literally sat in tears feeding him. I didn't want to get my hopes up too much though as I could tell he was still struggling with his teeth. I offered again before his nap but he wasn't interested and just wanted to sleep. He later fed again from the opposite side with no biting and has since fed a lot, no doubt trying to build my supply back up to what it was.

Every child is different and could refuse nursing for a variety of reasons. All we can do is offer but never force. Enjoy lots of extra cuddles, let them sleep on you, take a bath together let them know you're there if they want and hope they come back. If you're going through a strike I know it's so tough on you. You're most likely feeling emotionally exhausted and that's OK. Don't blame yourself, it isn't your fault. Your baby still loves and needs you but they need you to be a little bit patient with them right now. I really hope your story ends happily like ours has and if it doesn't, remember you've had x amount of time doing a wonderful job supporting, providing, and caring for your baby. The most important thing is that they're fed and loved.

Resources I found helpful are linked below.

https://www.laleche.org.uk/nursing-strikes/